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Drinking and eating facebook statuses

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*goes out of room*
*grabs food*
*goes back in the room*
*repeats the next day*
Status By: anonymous
Sandwiches taste better when someone else makes them because when you make your own, you anticipate its taste and become less hungry for it.
Status By: anonymous
If you eat 2 bananas it gives you enough energy for an intense 90 minute work out or 40 minute sexual intercourse.
Status By: anonymous
pizza won`t divorce you
pizza won`t betray you
pizza won`t cheat on you
pizza won`t fight with you

why don`t people just marry pizza
Status By: anonymous
I hate brushing my teeth at night because that signifies that you cant have anymore food and im just never ready for that kind of commitment
Status By: anonymous
The most effective cure for a hangover is drinking a banana milkshake.
Status By: anonymous
Dear food either stop being so delicious or stop making me fat!
Status By: anonymous
When something says "edible" and I thinks it says "eat-a-ble" #lmao
Status By: anonymous
That sad moment When you get home and find out somebody ate the food you was thinking about all day
Status By: anonymous
Status By: anonymous


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